Why Green Bay Packer Cheerleader Barbie was a bad idea…

When I went to the annual “girls day” Packer game this year with Emily, Robin and Amy, I decided to get each kid a souvenir from the game.  Drue was the lucky recipient of the Green Bay Packer Cheerleader Barbie, who came with the full cheerleader outfit, including megaphone, football and pom-pons.

Naturally, Barbie’s neat little package has been completely disassembled, and parts of her ensemble are strewn throughout my house and car.

Today, I unplugged my cell phone charger to plug in my Garmin charger.  I noticed immediately that the Garmin charger could not be plugged in.  When I realized why, I almost screamed…

Seriously. Note the ominously placed pom-pon, too...

Several questions came to mind immediately:

• How the heck am I going to get this out?
• How did the little pom-pon land so conveniently next to the football?
• Where is the other pom-pon?
• Where is the megaphone?
• Could someone please dust my car?

 

An Afternoon with Elmo

Today we had the encounter of a lifetime.  We went down to the Milwaukee Public Library auditorium to see Kevin Clash, the creator of Elmo!

The encounter of a lifetime!

Yesterday, the MPTV representative called to tell me that Drue’s question was selected by Kevin Clash to be answered on stage by Elmo.  Her question was “Are there fake Elmos, like there are fake Santas and Easterbunnies at the mall?”  The lady told me we would have reserved seats, which was a nice thing to hear since the event was general admission!  We could never imagined, though, that our seats would be in the very first row!

When he came out on stage, he walked out with a black duffel bag.  He introduced himself, then went over and unzipped the bag.  A second later, Elmo was alive on his arm!

The kids went ballistic, and to be honest, so did many of the adults. He engaged the audience immediately and sang the Sesame Street theme song as well as “Elmo’s Song,” which he modified to include the names of some kids in the audience.  It was so cute to see kids interact with Elmo.

When it came time to answer the questions, he came down to the audience.  When he approached Drue, she panicked a little and her question came out:  “Are you fake like Santa and the Easterbunny?”  He cracked up!!!  He repeated her question in his microphone, then Elmo said “But Santa’s REAL!”  It was quite hilarious.  Drue was embarrassed, however, and got a little teary-eyed after the show ended.  I assured her that the question was funny and that he really got a kick out of it.  She recovered quickly when she realized we were going to get his autograph!

Our tickets came with wristbands that got us into a book signing reception.  I was surprised to see refreshments, including Elmo cupcakes!  I can’t believe the value – under $20 per person for the ticket, a copy of Clash’s book “My Life as a Furry Red Monster” and the reception.  We waited in a long line to get our book signed and have some photo opps.  I was very impressed at the amount of time he spent with each family… He didn’t rush it at all and was very generous with the pictures.

I was as excited as the kids, I think...

Drue said “Elmo, I want you to meet Elmo…”  and held up her love-battered Elmo doll.  The real Elmo must have misunderstood her.  He started to EAT her Elmo.  The kids were overjoyed.

 

Sibling Rivalry

Last night, on the heels of the Halloween weekend (and way too much candy) I caved in and permitted a rare “family bed” night.  My daughter, son and I all nestled in and drifted off to a lovely state of slumber.

I awoke around midnight, and wrestled with my typical insomnia.  Just as I started to doze, Brett woke up screaming “Mom!  Drue wet the bed!”  I abruptly sat up and instantly noticed that he was surrounded by a pee-pee ring, (Yes.  MY bed. Ahem.) and she was snoring away, dry as a bone.

It hit me instantly.  I came up with a theory at this wee hour that we are born with equipment to defend ourselves against the sometimes false allegations of our siblings. I suppose it could go deeper than that, all the way to the level of basic human self-defense, but the way I see it?  Brothers and sisters have a special bond.

 

The Fast Track – DERAILED!

Sometimes, I put a soda in the freezer. I call this the “fast track,” and sometimes I do it in the morning before I leave for work.

It is a great technique, unless you forget to take it out when you leave for ten or eleven hours.

Case in point:

Oh boy – there was some serious trajectory…

This is what a frozen rootbeer looks like. How is it the entire inside of my freezer is also covered?

 

Ah, Grasshoppah

Last night, I was closing the curtains when something rather large flew into my head.

That’s right – a green blur whizzed into my peripheral vision, hit my head, then bounced onto the window.

My instinct told me it was a grasshopper, but upon closer inspection I think it was a Praying Mantis.  How it got into my house is anyone’s guess, but the kids freaked out, worried that he was lost and scared.

Brett and I scooped the little fella into a tupperware and took him out on the deck for a going away party, so he could find his Mom and Dad.

 

Lunch Break Gone Wrong

Today at lunch, The Piege, Trevor and I went out to take a walk and take some pics of a building being demolished next to our office. LOOK WHAT HAPPENED!

…After a little Photoshop skill was applied, that is…

 

Oh, Say… Can You See? Because Half of Kwik Trip Did.

Picture it:  The Fourth of July, 2008.  A beautiful day, I decided to wear one of my favorite “kick-about” outfits, a strapless number I bought at Target in Florida last summer.  I did some yard work, and after the kids got picked up for their camping trip, threw on a sleeveless white button down top to wear out on errands.

My first stop was at Kwik Trip.  I got out of the car, pumped gas, went in, putzed around and browsed through their surprising selection of junk food, soda and candy, and then made my way to the Nectar of the Gods station.  (Coffee, of course.  Hawaiian Chocolate Macadamia Nut, to be exact.  Ahhhh…) As I pumped the lifeblood into my Karuba mug (CHEAP REFILLS!) I saw a clerk walk behind the station and I saw him glance at me.  I noticed his eyes lingered for a moment below my neckline, and he abruptly walked away. I looked down and WHOA, NELLY – my dress was below the bustline, and I do mean BELOW.

Fireworks went off in my  head as I tried to maintain calm, although I think I actually let out an exclamation.  I fixed the order of things, just in time to see the aforementioned clerk summon a female employee into the back room, where I heard an explosive burst of laughter.

Imagine the delight of the poor people who had to work this national holiday, as they undoubtedly gathered around the surveillance tape at shift change.

“And how many did stare?

Laugh bombs bursting in air…

Made me think of the night

that my top was still there…”

 

In Memoriam: Estelle Getty

I guess I knew this day would come,  but I am truly sad to hear of the passing of Estelle Getty, the actress who played the spry, wry and ever-so-lovable Sophia Petrillo on my favorite show of all times – ‘Golden Girls.’

The Queen of Sarcasm, Sophia Petrillo could be one mean cookie; notably meanest to her own daughter Dorothy Zbornak, played by the great Bea Arthur. The writers of the show masterfully captured the unwritten phenomenon of “Mother-to-Daughter criticism: Sometimes acidic, but always stemming from love,” and I can’t think of another actress in recent history who could bring this mastery to life like Estelle Getty did.

Rest in peace, Estelle.

 

Blogclobber – “Vanity Plates Crack Me Up”

by Heiderino on the April 19th, 2006

Have you ever been toodling along, minding your own business, when a BMW drives past you with a maddening license plate such as “JIMS BMW?”

The term “new money” immediately comes to mind.

If I don’t already know what a BMW is, telling me that you are driving one is moot. I don’t know what it is, and nor do I care. Also, if you are the “CEO VIP” of your company, that is great, but it doesn’t do much for anyone’s ego but your own. Actually, it’s a good bet that this annoys the living heck out of employees who see your car in the VIP spot every day too. You might as well say “IM BETTER.”

Then there are the hilarious misspellings – some so bad you can’t figure out the plate to save your own life. Sure, sometimes people are clever with great combinations of letters and numbers, but more often I see one like I saw today – DEUTSH on an Audi. The simple lack of C was enough to make my skin crawl. Of course, I have never been a fan of purposeful misspellings (Ha! Even foreign!) such as “krazy,” or “nite,” which may explain this a bit more.

One last thing to consider when getting a personalized plate: At least in Wisconsin, it’s easy to find out who drives a car just by their license plate. With this in mind, you may want to get the plate “STALK ME.”

 

Blogclobber – “Some days I wish I was a dog.”

by Heiderino on the May 25th, 2006

I just got home, got caught up in the hustle and bustle of getting the kids fed, happy, bathed, etc. etc. etc.
When I walked into the living room and caught a glimpse of the couch, I realized that Decker (our Cairn terrier) gets to lay around all day, and never has any other expectations from me but that he not chew on anything, pee in the house, or throw up.

I would like to be a dog for just one day. Or maybe just trade places with Decker so he can see how good he really has it!